情緒逃避與超越 – 第二部分
Emotional Escape vs. Transcendence – Part 2
Negativity is often sourced in deep layers of our consciousness, either in our unconscious or subconscious. Some forms of meditation see the mind as impulsive, repetitive, nonsensical and prone to negativity. It is, but is it simply that, or is something deeper about our underlying psychology being revealed? Is recurring thought, an attempt by our subconscious to cleanse a deeper wound or pattern, or to bring our attention to a misunderstanding or new understanding?
When we attempt to renounce our negative emotions, and instead focus on the positive, our subconscious will actually rebel against this denial. The pressure of duality builds up in our system and the subconscious begins to create repetitive thought in an attempt to seek our attention. The subconscious continues to purge negativity into our conscious mind, awaiting processing and release. If we continue to ignore our patterns of negativity, eventually it leaks into our personality, language, behaviors, life decisions, relationships etc. Unresolved negativity creates judgment, bitterness, unhappiness and continuous dissatisfaction with life.
A person can try to ignore both his negative emotion and associated thoughts but it will take effort. He must continuously point attention away from his true feelings to “try” to stay positive. It is a tiresome activity to continuously avoid your self. Repressed darkness simply grows. Hoping to build enough light to outshine our darkness is like building a beautiful house on a garbage dump. You can stay in your house of light and deny anything outside your house exists. But, if you decide to leave your front door, you will immediately encounter garbage everywhere. A garden will not suddenly sprout in your front-yard just because your house has been neatly and perfectly arranged.
What is unresolved emotionally shows up as endless waves of negative thought from the subconscious. Humans are notorious for their ability to redirect attention, to absorb themselves in usual forms of evasion and escape like alcohol, internet, phones, entertainment, work etc. Constant distraction only buries our feelings under our busyness. Even awakened beings may use their heightened state of consciousness to create a false sense of having transcended their emotional reality.
One may be able to evade their true state for some time but our default state of unresolved negativity will always return. If our repression is successful however, the sharp edges of our negativity will become dull, and a slow heavy drone of depression will arise. This is none other than a desensitized state, a thick cloud of numb emotionless energy. Indeed, repression leads to depression, which is the fear to feel and face what is there. This is not an ideal alternative to simply facing our negativity and clearing our pain. The fear we build up around facing our darkness is often worse than the actual process of going through it.
Emotion does not fully dissolve just by taking on a higher perspective, holding onto optimism, or even dissolve with time. A higher perspective is a removed mental state, however emotional pain needs to be penetrated from inside the emotional body for healing to occur. The practice of optimism is often artificial, a surface solution which does not address the causes for the loss of natural optimism. And time does not heal wounds, it is the maturation of our being through time that does. If our emotions are irrational, it is not time that dissolves it, but the return of lucidity.
So, can our higher nature have the power to supplant our lower nature? If you hate yourself, but continue to repeat that you love yourself, will you change? If you are angry and told to just drop it, can you do it fully? Not really.
All genuine wounding requires the sensitivity and care of a true healing process to clear. One needs to go through a visceral feeling process and truly meet with the vulnerability, humility and humanness that pain brings us into. Only in the softness and realness of embracing the truth of our emotions, does healing occur. Only through genuine healing, can negativity dissolve. Only through the rising of love and understanding, can positivity return. Only pain that we pass through can later transmute into love. Pain that we deny and renounce stays stuck in us as unseen, unresolved energy. We cannot heal a crying child by ignoring its pain; we must pick the child up and hold it until the tears are done falling.
In this sense, it is fundamental to learn the difference between transcendence and escape. True transcendence is effortless, where there is no need to position oneself on the positive side of reality. If an emotion is truly resolved, then we are actually free from it. We lose any need to ‘deal’ with it in any way. Transcendence means that emotion has passed through us, can do so again, and we are fine with that. Escape is when emotion is always on our tail and so we have to stay one step ahead to not get caught. Escape only produces fear. Transcendence is stillness, no matter what wind is passing through. Transcendence results only when healing has been genuine.
To summarize, renouncing negativity cannot work until pain is dissolved. Trying to supplant our lower nature with a focus on our higher nature, doesn’t work either. Pain cannot dissolve until truly healed, and only true healing brings transcendence. Renunciation, repression, and refocus are all forms of escape where subconscious negativity continues to spew forth impulsively in moments we lose hold of our aim to “stay positive.” The key is to move into a true state of inner freedom, where our peace is effortless and not just an ongoing attempt to stare through a tunnel of light. Meeting our vulnerable selves, our beloved tender humanness, healing our pain from the depth of feeling, it cannot be avoided.